And so this is Christmas.

G'day and merry christmas!

I hope it feels more festive where you are as there is a distinct lack of Christmas spirit in Australia. Maybe it's the weather. Or the Ashes (more later) but Christmas came and went and I barely noticed. Still I made the most of the time off work and, yes, I have photos to prove it.

Christmas Eve
Busy, busy, busy at work but come the evening it was time to relax and head to the Botanic Gardens and the Moonlight Cinema. The film, rather tongue-in-cheek considering the day, was Life of Brian (one woman I got talking to was only there because her son was working at the bar and she wanted to spend time with him while avoiding the film because she was a good Christian - I was going to explain that the film isn't really blasphemous but life's too short to bother with Christians).

Christmas Day
Weird. Very weird. Opened a few presents (thanks Fiona, Sally and Imogen) and then went for a walk along the beach to St Kilda.

Next Christmas I'll be asking Santa for Botox

Weather forecast was wrong and it wasn't as sunny or warm as predicted, but I paddled in the sea and the atmosphere in St Kilda (the Barmy Army cricket fans had arrived) was good.

Santa forgot he still had presents to deliver. And the elves were looking worse for wear.

And then back to Christmas lunch. What to have? I tried to keep it a bit traditional but wanted a twist so ended up with Quorn pasties, potatoes, carrots and broccoli - with satay sauce (worked better than it sounds), followed by a Crunchie and a Flake.

Cliff's Christmas lunch - the two turtle doves were impressed (partridge in pear tree just out of shot)

And that, more or less, was Christmas Day.

Boxing Day
Australians call it Boxing Day too (but they don't know where the name comes from either). I'd planned to get out of Melbourne for the first time since I arrived and had booked a daytrip along the coast to Phillip Island. It's famous for the Penguin Parade (hundreds of penguins coming up the beach at sunset to return to their nests) but photography's not allowed (unless you're Asian and pretend you don't speak English) so you won't see any of the little guys here, but they were cute as anything (it was the day for cute Aussie animals), waddling more than usual because of very full bellies (to feed the chicks) and largely oblivious to the crowds.

Taking us on our day out was friendly driver Laurence who had a tale of doom about every section of road and beach on the trip (either someone had died in a car crash, or been swept away by a wave, or fallen off a cliff). The food was bad (worst pizza EVER - it had carrots on it!!) and it was cold (wind straight from the Antarctic) but some great sights made up for it.

First was a mini Australian zoo.

Koalas - cute but lazy

Wombat - cute but sad looking

Wallaby and Cliff - cute and hungry (the wallaby and Cliff)

Wallaby, Cliff's hand and (another) wallaby's tail

Er, what the sign says. No sign of Rod Hull (think he was busy with a TV aerial or something)

Kangaroos - not that cute and not that interesting, just lazy

Tasmanian Devil - not very cute but endangered so be nice

Then we had a look round Phillip Island (it's about two hours southeast of Melbourne).

Cliff and Pyramid Rock (my hair was trying to copy the shape of the rock I think)

The Nobbies (?) - bird-nesting site and seals (neither visible)

South shore of island - wild

Rainbow over Phillip Island (maybe the title of a book I write)

And then it was back to Melbourne, getting back around midnight.

Monday 27th: Cliff falls in love - with the Ashes
A year, nay, a month or two ago, I would have bet everything I have against me ever watching cricket, never mind paying to watch it, and yet I have to say that the day I spent at the Ashes was one of the best things I've done here. It was freezing cold (well, not freezing, but there was a cold wind all day) and even that didn't stop me loving it. And no, it wasn't just because England were winning or because the Barmy Army created a good atmosphere (in fact, they got a bit annoying after a while). There was just something about it that was highly addictive.

The 'G' as it's known by Melburnians

Pietersen batting (he's very very tall - or maybe everyone else was very very small)

The crowd (mostly Barmy Army)

Best song by the crowd? The one about Mitchell Johnson, Australian bowler:
He bowls to the left.
He bowls to the right.
Poor Mitchell Johnson -
His bowling is shite.

I was there from 10.40 (just after it started) until 6pm when they stopped for the day, and would have gone again if I could have got a ticket. Doesn't look like England needed my support though...

And so that was Christmas. Not what I'm used to but still fun.

G'bye for now.
Cliff